Bible Study

This year I am participating in a Bible Study with other teachers from my school. We get together once a week, chat and discuss the bible. We have been studing from 2 different books. And ya know what I feel like I have really learned something this year.
I am leading this current bible study and I asked a question at the last meeting. I asked, "Has God ever not answered your prayers?" I asked the question because I felt like I needed to fill time. The study was moving so fast I needed a way to slow it down. But sometimes I ask things without realizing the consequences. In my head I was thinking of JED and the question that went unanswered - or so I thought.
My question prompted one of my friends to discuss me in her Sunday School Class. She knows that JED not being a Christian has played really hard on my heart. She brought this up in class and the answer she got back was simply that I have gotten so close to God that I have touched his robe. Because I was there for him and helped him die I have been close to God. WOW- when I heard that it took me back. I have gotten close to God. I never thought of it that way.
Although I am really glad to be a part of this bible study last year when I first heard about it I couldn't join it. I was so angry that they weren't here for me when I needed them most. I needed them to let me in when JED was dieing. I needed prayer and support then and not 2 years later. But this year I let the anger go and was ready to hear what they had to teach. This is the first time I feel like I have learned something. I can really relate the bible to my life and how to use it daily. And then it hit me - that footprints poem - the one with God holding me and me only seeing one set of footprints. I couldn't have been a part of the group when JED was dieing. I needed prayer for me and not with me. I needed to be the prayer. I needed to be held and I was held. While God and everyone else held me I held onto JED. I really was close to God.


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